Cup half full

I have not been blogging much but that is because I have been exceptionally busy getting my website together (with the genius of my sister Naomi). Please check it out and give me some feedback and then spread the word. Im really looking forward to hearing from you.
Much love
Daniella

Some say less is more, so no apologies for being a stranger. Just been living really, dealing with life as it comes my way. Its a funny old world we live in. I have emerged from my cocoon and am spreadng my wings, realising the opportunities that are there for the taking and life is good, better than I ever remember it.

Then something happens to focus my attention on where I have come from. My mum is diagnosed with breast cancer and is having a mastectomy at the end of May. She is so far away but speaking to her on the phone, I realise that she is taking a ride on the very same rollercoaster that I spent so much time on 2 years ago. It is difficult to be aware of what she is going through, it feels like I am revisiting an old haunt, but obviously a necessary thing for me to be doing at the moment.

Hello everyone,

I’ve been off the radar for quite sometime but am thinking about writing a book so was just reviewing some of my blog when I had this sudden urge to write. I have missed you all quite a lot:-)

Life is, well life really. I am living day to day, pretty much as I always have; I just have more hair this year. I have spent a lot of time last year coming to terms with what had happened to me and just dealing with the anger and fear that took over with my diagnosis. I have dealt with a lot of emotional baggage that I have been carrying around for most of my life and the whole process has been cathartic. I feel as though I am still in the emergence stage, a bit like coming out of a cocoon. I have done a lot of necessary house work and although I still feel I have some work to do, I am emerging, a new person, and I like her a lot more than I did the one that stepped into that cocoon in 2007.

It is important to me that the people closest to me learn to trust in me again. Perhaps trust is not the right word. Let me try to explain. I think that my diagnosis put a lot of pressure onto those closest to me. Suddenly I was not able to contribute as I always had, on so many levels. I was out of 'circulation' all year in 2007 due to treatment and then dealing with the effects of the treatment and the emotional rollercoaster and the 'causes' took up the whole of 2008. My family thought they were getting me back last year and I wasn't able to be there for them. It has been hard on all of us but I am emerging from this madness and ready to embrace life.

One thing I have realised is that life is short and there is no time to be unhappy, or stuck doing something you don't feel good about. Make those moves, take those chances and grab life with both hands. There is no time for regret.

Life seems to have swept me up and my feet have barely touched the ground since my treatment finished. My hair is growing back beautifully and I am starting to feel a bit more like 'myself' for the first time in a long, long time.

I have been going to the gym (time permitting and not nearly as often as I would like) but my fitness levels are creeping up which is brilliant. I have given myself a goal to work towards. I am signed up to run the 'Race for Life' to raise money for cancer research. (Any donations welcome).

I have also made the decision to get back to work. I have explored the prospect of working for someone but decided I need to blaze ahead and get my business off the ground. No time like the present and I am really motivated at the moment.

If last year taught me anything, it would have to be that we NEED challenges in our lives in order to keep ourselves sane and ultimately, healthy. We need to achieve too, it keeps our energy vibrating and our self esteem in tact and it means we can walk tall with our head held high. These things are vital to our physical health in the long run.

I am thinking about writing a book. Just a short one. I’ve had a huge wake up call and the lessons learned may just help someone else out there. I will keep updating my blog but only occasionally. Lack of time and material limits my activity.

Here is a link to my sponsorship page if anyone is feeling generous.
Thanks
http://www.raceforlifesponsorme.org/daniellaslabbert

I logged on to my blog this morning, for the first time in a very long time. I had a look at the statistics, thinking that people would have lost interest as I have not been updating my blog for so long, but I am astounded and pleasantly surprised that there is still an audience out there. Thank you all for your patience.

Well, my treatments are all finished now and life carries on. My hair is growing back. It came out a striking 'salt and pepper' color which was great fun initially, but I just felt I am too young to be grey, so I dyed it and now I’m a delicious blond. I will be becoming a luscious red head soon, so watch this space.

Its lovely having eyebrows and eyelashes and a hair line again. The rest could quite happily have stayed away but unfortunately all the other hair on my body is back with a vengeance. Back to plucking and shaving and waxing... My nails are just starting to get back to normal too.

In an attempt to fully get back to normal, I have found a job for 2 days a week. I’m so excited about it. It’s been 3 and a half years since I last did a proper job and I’m really relishing the time.

The girls are both well. Ruby is eating us out of house and home and Laila had her first nativity play in which she was a robin. I was so proud of her. She did such a good job and brought tears to our eyes.

Laith is also well. He is taking 2 weeks off work to recharge and relax before a busy 2008. Hopefully we will be going away for a while.

I am going to the gym, in training for the RACE FOR LIFE. Its fantastic having the energy, even just to run 1 km. I’m also swimming which I’m LOVING although I only manage 2 / 3 laps at a time between short breaks.

The reason I haven't been updating my blog much is that I haven't had the time to just sit down and do it. Family life is running me off my feet. But please know that I am well and embracing life and trying to get back to some sort of normality after a year of chaos. I am open to all sorts of wonderful new experiences and bear no malice or resentment in my heart. My life starts now and I intend to make the most of it.

Merry Christmas to you all and all the very best for 2008.

As a few of you already know, I am planning to do the RACE FOR LIFE run in 2008 as well as possibly the MOONWALK for breast cancer (depending on the dates for 2008).
I am recruiting as many people as I can to do the races with me to raise awareness and money for breast cancer research and care. I would love to print shirts with BREASTAWARE on it. This is my focus for 2008.

My body and mind have been to hell and back this year and now that I am feeling a little better, and my energy levels are on the up, I need to get myself fit and strong and healthy and I want to take as many of you as possible with me.

Information for the ‘mini marathons’ will be posted on my blog as soon as I get it and any progress made will also be posted. Watch this space.

Today was the beginning of the end of my journey. I started my radiotherapy today. I woke up late and had to rush out of the door without any breakfast so by the time I got there, I was desperately lacking in concentration.

After a short chat about what was going to happen, I was ushered into a changing room to sport my new, dashing hospital gown (which I get to take home with me). I then waited to be called into the radiotherapy room. I was then told to take off my shoes and get onto the bed placing my feet on the board at the bottom. They then moved me in millimetres and drew on me and the huge radiotherapy machine waltzed around me and took photos and measurements. Then they left me alone to do the radiotherapy. I couldn’t help but wonder what the hell I was doing there, all alone in this sterile, freezing cold room.

It was all over in minutes (very cold minutes). I got dressed and left. I headed straight for a coffee and a chelsea bun. On my way home, I stopped and bought a magazine. In it there was an article about 3 women who had survived breast cancer and their stories. I read it on the train and it had me in tears, just bringing back memories of chemo and the relationships this illness affects. I’m on the home straight now and am looking forward to a long life of health and prosperity.

I haven’t written for a while because there hasn’t been much to say. My energy levels are just about back to normal. My hair is growing. There is still too much skin showing so I am still wearing a wig unless at home.

It was Laila’s birthday party last weekend and we had a fantastic day of food and drink and cake (and bouncy castles). As soon as I have downloaded the photos, I will post some.

I start my radiotherapy on Monday and then follows a gruelling 4 and a half week cycle but then I get my life back and we can go on holiday. Roll up November.

Just a quick entry to mention that little Ruby had her operation this afternoon. She is 19 weeks old and has been through … 2 operations, 2 biopsies and chemotherapy in utero. One month in special care baby unit (half of which was in an incubator) Full leg casts reapplied weekly and now an operation under local anaesthetic. She has endured a lifetime of medical stuff during her short little life.

She was so brave. I volunteered Laith to take Ruby into theatre. The operation took all of half an hour under local anaesthetic. Laith came out with tears in his eyes. Apparently Ruby cried when they made the incisions. Poor little thing and I do feel for Laith having to watch and comfort his youngest little princess through it all.

Ruby and Laila are both fast asleep and I’m heading the same way so I’m off to bed. I have a training course in the morning…